Chapter 12: Earthburst Golden Lotus (2)

As if a meteor had devastated the landscape… the soaring streak of red light from just now had suddenly revealed their blood-drenched captain in front of everyone… and the ground covered in wilted lotuses.

In that twinkling moment where everything was revealed, all words lost their original function. They were stunned. Besides being stunned, they were also shocked. It was unimaginable… Apart from unimaginable, it was also outrageous.

“This… The heck is this…” In disbelief, Vice Captain Chen observed everything before his eyes. What on earth had happened? What had occurred moments ago? Even a moron would be able to see that the violent earthquake had occurred from a terrible blow to the ground by an unknown object. Now that holes of all sizes of magnitudes could be seen on the ground, everything could be explained for.

What on earth had happened? What had struck the ground? Was there such an organism on earth? This… was a serial killer? Even a blind person could see that a bloody battle had just been staged here recently. But… where was Captain Xu’s opponent?!

Countless questions lingered on their minds, but suddenly, a voice echoed out. Captain Gao said in a trembling voice directed into his megaphone: “Everyone… b-besides people in charge, d-depart immediately… This is an order!”

There were several parties in charge. The army’s three lieutenant colonels, Vice Captain Chen, and Captain Gao, yet all of them took the same action by chance, walking towards Xu Yangyi.

This was because… there was a tremendous, ten-meter-deep crater over at the side! It was simply too eye-catching to be ignored!

Their footsteps were silent as they walked over to the side of the crater, and the several people traded looks with each other. They listlessly looked at the crater again, unable to say a single word.

“C-Captain Xu…” It wasn’t known how much time had passed until Vice Captain Chen suddenly turned his head, gazing at Xu Yangyi with fiery eyes and said warblingly: “J-just now, what the heck happened?”

“What was up with that streak of red light? How did these lotus leaves get here? What’s up with this crater? Where’s the criminal? How did sir handle the criminal?”

Too many questions. The rise of the first question was like an opening of floodgates, frantically spilling out. The other several people no longer spoke as well, only their heated gazes made manifest were fixed on Xu Yangyi.

The landscape was already beyond scientific explanation… They didn’t dare to think of it, didn’t dare go in the direction that was as immeasurable as gods and devils… Why hadn’t they seen a single creature in front of them a moment ago, but in a second, like an edited video, how was it that so many things had suddenly appeared?

No one could explain it besides the man in front of them… He was simply like the sole witness in a legend. Everyone’s hearts were bursting with curiosity as they waited for Xu Yangyi to speak. However, Xu Yangyi didn’t plan to give an explanation at all and sat down to treat his injuries: “Mao Ba’er, come out and clean up.”

The muscles on everyone’s faces slightly cramped. The heck’s up with you? Why don’t you say something, alright! A person can’t use the excuse of hunting a criminal to explain this kind of scene anymore, right?! With so many eyes fixed on you helplessly, you got the nerve to pretend that there’s no one else around and treat your injuries?!

“Did you cause this?” Finally, Old Zhu couldn’t bear it any longer and asked.

This ought to have been the case… The only person here was Xu Yangyi… however…

Was he still a goddamn human?! Could a human cause these kinds of earthly alterations? Was a human capable of such world-shaking sorcery?

“Yes.” Xu Yangyi glanced over, clear and cut to the point. In fact, his wounds weren’t serious. It was just the bone spurs that had pierced into his body were rather hard to take care of. Presently, he was like a hedgehog and pulling out that which couldn’t be pulled out. He only used his muscle to clamp tightly on the bone spurs.

A single word seemed to have flipped on some switch. Everyone looked at each in dismay, each set of eyes conveying the same information: this couldn’t be true! Absolutely everything was a dream tonight! However, not a single person came out and said it. The present scene was silently dreadful. 

“C-Captain Xu… R-really, it was you?” Several seconds later, Vice Captain Chen’s voice came floating. This was the first time he had addressed Xu Yangyi as captain in true heartfelt sincerity.

Not replying, Xu Yangyi pulled out the short bone spurs neither urgently nor slowly. The drawing of each spur brought with it dark-red blood. On his stomach, there were a couple 30-40 centimeter bone spurs exposed that he dared not to pull out. Nevertheless, the current scenery formed a strange kind of harmony.

“Captain Xu… Uhh, w-what is that on your body?” Captain Gao asked and swallowed a mouthful of saliva down his throat once another minute passed. No one felt that this was an insult to them. 

“Phew…” Pulling out the final minor bone spur, Xu Yangyi furrowed his brows and said: “Mao Ba’er? Get to work.”

“Boohoo, boohoo…” The sound of weeping could be heard from inside the car. Afterwards, the expressions on everyone’s faces turned odd.

A pudgy husky, no less than half the size of a man, was shifting on its fat butt and using its paws like a human to wipe its eyes. Its right hand, no… Its right paw held onto a laptop, and it dawdled out of the car with difficulty.

“C-Captain Xu…” Old Zhu was the first who couldn’t contain herself: “You just said a moment ago it's named…”

“Mao, Mao Ba’er.” Xu Yangyi laughed, supplementing with a word: “My assistant. My unit is rather bizarre. Combat members need to have a supervising agent. He’s… not bad.” [1]

Where the hell was this a cat?! [2]

Have you ever laid your eyes on a cat wearing a husky’s fur?! What are you saying it’s not even bad? This was bizarre!

If it weren’t for the strange scene in front of them, there was a possibility that everyone would be currently shrieking in fear. However, all of them only used a bewildered gaze to size up the talking husky—one of the internet’s Three Great Moe Mascots along with the equally famous raccoon and Japanese Shiba Inu. [3]

It couldn’t be helped to say… Captain Xu’s interests were somewhat peculiar… The implications of a young married woman raising a big dog were often heard, but when did young men like to raise big dogs, as well…

“Pretty boy… You actually added ‘Deliver Me’ to the playlist… It’s too touching… Too sorrowful… It m-made me cry…” Mao Ba’er, the husky that could spit out human speech, waddled over and set down his laptop, sobbing: “It deserves to be one of the Three Great Forbidden Songs that drive humans to death upon listening to it… Not only humans, even dogs can weep once they hear it… and experience a similar sadness…” [4]

Everyone took a double take. Experience a similar sadness… to see a similar death, associate it with one’s own future end and feel the sorrow?

Who was similar to you?!

“Mao Ba’er.” Xu Yangyi shouted out neither slowly nor hurriedly. 

The husky trembled from tail to snout and used both his paws to immediately flip open the computer and began to type at it clickity-clack. After he looked at the computer for roughly three seconds, he wailed to the heavens and banged his head on the ground, beginning to weep bitterly.

“Boohoo, boohoo… Heavens… I can’t go on! Boohoo, boohoo… Woof! Woof! Woof!” The amalgamation of tones were enough to feel that the husky’s sorrowful mood could illuminate the sun and moon.

“These serpent bones are unappraisable. You completely ruined them.” Mao Ba’er fixed Xu Yangyi with a secretly bitter look. Within everyone’s horrified gazes, Mao Ba’er was like a man standing up, using an incomparably righteous and strict tone of voice and pressing his paw on Xu Yangyi’s stomach: “How many times have I told you?! Each time before we capture a demon, you need to avoid injuring the precious parts! If not, where is the money you use to buy cultivation resources going to come from?! Woof! I’ve had no income for a month straight because of your predisposition for mad destruction and because you keep ending up like this!”

It was a scene brimming with an indescribable strangeness and sentiment. A big husky with one back paw stepping on the computer, the other back paw planted on the ground, a front paw rested on his hips, and the other front paw forcefully pressed on Xu Yangyi’s chest. With his spittle flying and tongue lashing about, it was obvious that a straight month without income really made the husky sad. So much that he had erupted with such a powerful fighting strength.

“Serpent’s gall is estimated to be worth a pretty penny, but this is a berserker! Don’t you know what a berserker is?! The purest demon form! The price comparison to ordinary demon forms is over three times in value! For example, you could hand over a portion of this glorious snake skin for a luxury brand item for at least 200,000 big ones! But now!”

“It wrecked itself. Maybe it liked playing the masochist.” Xu Yangyi lazily sat down in the car and lit a cigarette, taking a deep drag from it.

The bone spur lodged into his diaphragm through his back made him grimace.

“This isn’t important! This is only the details!” A fire burned within Mao Bao’ers two eyes, and he bit into Xu Yangyi’s hand. The crackling fire in his eyes was made audible: “The important point is… the last technique you used to kill it was Solution Ninety-One! Its demon core has completely fragmented! I’ve scanned it three times already! We won’t be able to sell a single cent of it!

Xu Yangyi swept his eyes over Mao Ba’er indifferently for a moment: “Let go of my hand… No, stop biting me.”

“Hmph!” The husky adorably flung his head back in defiance.

“Okay, I’ll remember to be a bit more gentle next time.” Xu Yangyi massaged his temples: “Let’s handle official business first.”

“Remember your promise!” Mao Ba’er let go of Xu Yangyi’s hand and lapped at it. Upon seeing Xu Yangyi’s gaze, he immediately added on: “The saliva will heal minor wounds.”

Xu Yangyi puffed out a cloud of smoke and raised his middle finger. It was one thing to say something and another to do it. Mao Ba’er stuck his neck out and everyone saw a golden bell hanging from it.

Ting-a-ling… A faint chime rang out, and everyone present felt their eyelids suddenly become a thousand catties heavier. Less than five seconds later, all of them gently fell to the ground, and the sound of snoring filling the air.

“You sure they won’t remember?” Xu Yangyi gazed at the roof of the car, his eyelids beginning to turn heavy, as well. Painful waves of throbbing pressure began to flood his bones. At the beginning, it was only a slightly dull pain, but before three seconds had even passed, it seemed like someone was using countless hammers to smash into each of his bones. True pain drilled straight into his bone marrow!

It didn’t stop there… Even the qi sea within his dantian also turned in a burst of sudden sharp pain. His eyelids became heavier and heavier, and before he shut them again, he saw an adorable, curious face and a slobbering tongue that disgusted him. You got guts…

When Xu Yangyi woke up once more, he didn’t know how long he had slept for. He discovered he was lying down in a hospital bed.

“Don’t move…” A paw pressed down precisely upon his wound, mischievously using a bit of force. Mao Ba’er’s crude smiling face hazily emerged before him: “You’ve been in a coma for twelve days. This is Sanshui City’s Primary People’s Hospital. Do you feel that anything you look at is unusually blurry right now? Doesn’t it appear like I have a kind of indistinct Mona Lisa-esque beauty?” 

Xu Yangyi was unsure whether the academy branch had their heads screwed on tight when they had sent him such a reject.

“Water…” He roughly lifted his hand, and a cup was immediately placed at his side. Just as Xu Yangyi was about to drink, he suddenly fixed his eyes on Mao Ba’er, enduring the scalding pain of his throat with great difficulty: “What did you give me?”

Mao Ba’er carried the cup in his mouth and took it to the other side in a routine fashion. Afterwards, he flashed his adorable eyes at Xu Yangyi, looking for praise.

Why was it that an indescribable killing intent had come about in Xu Yangyi’s heart?

Under Xu Yangyi’s icy gaze, Mao Ba’er lowered his head and stood up, using both his paws to pour a glass of water again and muttered in discontent: “I’m going to sue you for racial discrimination...”

“Hehe…” Xu Yangyi was ultimately unable to restrain his grim laugh from slipping through. After he rested for half an hour…

Swish… 

“Woof! Woof, Woof!” 

Bang!

A husky was suddenly thrown out of the intensive care unit, and the door immediately closed shut. Soon after, the dog stood up like a human and began to frantically slam the door.

“Pretty boy! I’m warning you! You can’t humiliate me like this! Let me in right now! We can split it up 70-30 later on! However, I absolutely won’t allow you to hold your manager in such a manner!”

“60-40! 60-40 is the lowest I’ll go!  Hey… you wouldn’t change your manager, right? It’s really hard to find someone like me that’s self-walking and adorable!”

[1] He is actually the pronoun it. For the sake of avoiding confusion about the general situation v.s Mao Ba’er’s own standing I made it easier to understand.

[2] 拓麻 - I think this is another censor word for the F word. It also is the chinese for tamagotchi. LUL

[3] Moe is the best word I can use to describe the compound word for silliness/cuteness. It is an abstract concept of things that illicit “cutesy feelings that you want to snuggle”. Moe is a word I believe to have roots in Japanese anime subculture with the next closest cultural abstract idea I can think of being the Koreans “aegyo”.

[4] 物伤其类, chinese idiom that I translated as “meeting a similar sadness”. It’s actually more like “meeting a similar death” or the explanation I found is that you feel sad to upon seeing someone that meets a similar sad/bitter situation as well.