After the Black Tower’s voice stops, a bright white light fills Tang Mo’s vision, so bright that he can’t open his eyes.

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Tang Mo had already been prepared for this and waits, eyes closed, to enter the game. Yet three seconds later, what he hears is not joyful game music nor an eerie lullaby, but crisp chirps of birdsong.

Tang Mo opens his eyes in surprise.

This is a boundless forest.

The sky is shockingly blue, as if it was painted on with blue paint, and the shapes of the floating cotton-candy-like clouds are as neat as if someone used a compass to draw them, one by one, onto the sky. Giant trees separate the sky and land, their thick trunks extending smoothly into the air without a single side branch.

Tang Mo stands in this fairytale-like forest, frozen in shock.

But quickly, he calms down and begins to observe his surroundings.

The trees here are impossibly tall—even the smallest trees have a trunk diameter of seven or eight meters—but the grass is still normal-sized. Tang Mo carefully avoids stepping on any plants, just in case it’ll make any obvious noise. He’s wearing a pair of soft-soled running shoes, which are nearly silent as he walks on the soft, moist dirt.

Five minutes later, Tang Mo returns to his original spot and checks his items.

In his bag, there are two boxes of cookies, a bottle of water, a flashlight, a lighter, rope, and other tools. There are two small knives tied to his right leg and four darts hidden in an inner pocket in his jacket.

After checking everything, Tang Mo moves.

He’s already entered the Black Tower for ten minutes. Unlike Fu Wenduo, Tang Mo still has not received his main mission. The Black Tower only told him one thing—welcome to the Monster World—and has yet to say a single other word.

It’s been ten minutes. The Black Tower hasn’t given him any instructions, but Tang Mo can’t sit here and wait for death.

Careful and on-guard, he randomly chooses a direction and walks.

It’s very easy to get lost in these kinds of forests. Tang Mo didn’t prepare a compass, but who knows whether or not compasses would even work in this world? In the end, Tang Mo chooses a distinctive landmark and walks toward it. This way, at least he won’t keep walking in circles.

The large trees block the sun, so it’s impossible to tell directions like that. But among the dense overlapping treetops, a knifelike mountain stands tall above the ground. This mountain looks like a chef’s knife, thin but steep and very, very tall, with a layer of pure white ice covering the top. Tang Mo chooses this mountain as his landmark and decides to first walk out of the forest.

He walks for an hour.

The knifelike mountain is still far away. He can’t see the base of it at all.

The trees in the forest look exactly the same. After each ten minutes, Tang Mo finds ten pebbles and arranges them in a cross shape. An hour later, he hasn’t come across any of his own cross shapes.

“I haven’t been walking in circles, but I’m still not out of this forest…”

Tang Mo purses his lips tightly and speeds up, wanting to find a way out of the forest.

When Tang Mo passes by a tall redwood, his ears suddenly twitch as if he just heard something. He immediately stops and hides behind the redwood, focusing all his attention on this odd, quiet sound.

He listens for ten seconds. Melodious bird chirps and the rustling of leaves echo in the forest, but there don’t seem to be any other sounds.

Tang Mo’s gaze slowly sharpens, and he lies down on the ground, pressing his ear against the dirt, and continues to listen.

Slowly, he begins to hear that odd sound.

“Thump—”

“Thump—”

“Thump thump—”

“Thump thump thump thump—”

The sound becomes faster and faster, as if someone is striking a large drum. The drum beats sound frequently, vibrating in Tang Mo’s chest.

It’s getting closer!

Tang Mo leaps up from the ground, turns, and runs. He no longer cares whether or not he steps on any grass or makes noise. He runs as fast as he can in the direction he just came from, but the thumping sound is faster than him. Three minutes later, a huge white object flashes across the air and lands right in front of Tang Mo.

His gaze contracts.

“Hiss… hiss…”

A three-meter-tall rabbit sits in front of Tang Mo, staring at him with bright red eyes. Its huge claws forcefully shove dirt backwards, easily clawing out a sofa-sized clump of dirt. The clump of dirt hits a giant tree, making a loud thump.

Tang Mo slowly backs up, staring unblinkingly at this white rabbit.

This human and rabbit stand in the area between three trees, looking at each other.

The next moment, the rabbit’s muscled legs kick, making a beautiful arc in the air, and jumps towards Tang Mo.

Unhesitatingly, Tang Mo takes out the big match and dodges the rabbit’s attack, simultaneously whacking the rabbit’s neck. When the match comes into contact with the rabbit fur, metal sparks fly. The fur looks soft, but it’s actually as hard as steel. The rabbit is struck backwards, leaving a ten-meter-long mark. Tang Mo is also knocked into the air by the rebound force and slams into a big tree. A sweet taste wells in his throat and he nearly coughs up blood.

Ten meters apart, the human and rabbit stare at each other again, then once again attack.

The snow-white rabbit is not hindered by its large size. It moves extremely fast, forming streaks of shadows in the air. Tang Mo’s forced to keep retreating, using the big match to block the rabbit’s claws. In the end, he’s almost forced into a dead end.

Behind Tang Mo is a ten-meter-wide tree, and to the sides are thick bushes. He doesn’t hesitate, turning on his heel and rushing into the bushes.

The rabbit quickly follows, but Tang Mo hasn’t run far at all. He’s standing right behind the bushes, hands on his hips, glaring at the rabbit as he yells confidently, “Give back my grandpa!”

“My grandpa…”

“Grandpa…”

“Grand…”

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His loud, clear voice echoes in the wide forest for a long time. Tang Mo opens his mouth and makes an O shape. The rabbit’s ears shoot up, as if it’s realized that something’s wrong, and runs. The next second, a gust of scalding air shoots out of Tang Mo’s mouth, followed by raging flames.

Roaring flames pour into the flammable foliage. Immediately, a forest fire rages.

The ability ‘Monster, give back my grandpa’ can only be used once per day. When Tang Mo shouts ‘Give back my grandpa’ with his hands on his hips, he can spew out fires of 800 ℃ that last for thirty seconds.

Tang Mo uncontrollably spews out fire for thirty seconds. When his ability finally ends, the rabbit’s already gone, and an ocean of fire spreads out in front of him.

Tang Mo’s face pales, and he grabs his bag and runs.

If it wasn’t absolutely necessary, Tang Mo didn’t want to use this ability in the forest at all. This forest is full of vegetation, so if a fire starts, it’d be uncontrollable. The rabbit’s gone, but Tang Mo needs to leave right now as well, and he has to go around the trees, completely wasting his one hour of time before.

The fire burns even brighter. Tang Mo has run kilometers away and can still see the fire in the distance.

In the crimson fire, more and more trees fall under the licking flames. The forest fire spreads quicker and quicker, leaving Tang Mo with no more time. He runs forward like crazy when suddenly, a childlike voice sounds by his ear.

“Ding dong! Side Mission 1 activated: Disguise yourself as Little Red Riding Hood and enter Monster Valley.”

Tang Mo’s expression changes. He hasn’t even had time to understand what this means when he hears panicked screams.

“My god, it’s on fire! Monster Forest is on fire!”

“How could it suddenly ignite? I’m going to find Grandpa Elephant to put it out!”

The sound of many footsteps come from a distance away, running closer and closer. Judging by the sound, there are at least 20 people, and by the time Tang Mo hears them, they’re only about 100 meters away and he can no longer avoid them. In this emergency, Tang Mo climbs a big tree, shuffling into the leaves to hide himself.

Five minutes later, Tang Mo’s heart nearly stops.

He finally sees these talking things!

They’re not human at all; they’re all animals. Or rather, they’re monsters.

The leader is a buff man with a gorilla head. He has a gorilla’s head but a human’s body, muscles bursting out of a black tank top, hands holding two giant room-sized water tanks as he runs to the fire. Behind him, there’s also a pig-headed person, a monkey-headed person, and a giant snake crawling along with a hose.

Some only have animal heads, and others are completely animals.

Tang Mo holds his breath, gripping onto the tree. He hears his own heartbeat pounding in his ears, but the only thing he can do right now is minimize his own existence and pray that these monsters don’t find him.

Suddenly, a dog-headed person stops, nose twitching. It raises its head and looks at the leaves that Tang Mo is hiding in.

Tang Mo’s scalp goes numb. He grabs one of the darts in his pocket, but before he can throw it, the dog-headed person shouts, “Undergrounder! There’s an Undergrounder!”

All the monsters stop, turning their heads in unison, to look at Tang Mo.

“Catch the Undergrounder!”

“Catch him!”

Tang Mo jumps off the tree and onto another one.

Two giant monkeys pull themselves up the tree and leap after Tang Mo. Tang Mo doesn’t have time to hesitate, he can only continue jumping from tree to tree, the monkeys following closely behind him, and a group of monsters chasing on the ground.

Fuck! Aren’t you supposed to be putting out the fire?!

This is the first time that Tang Mo has ever wanted to curse this badly. But he can only think it in his head; he doesn’t even have time to speak as he rushes towards the next tree.

The forest fire burns brighter and faster, almost reaching the trees near Tang Mo, yet this group of monsters is still following him. Their eyes are as red as blood, and when the two giant monkeys look at him, sticky saliva drools out from between their sharp teeth.

As much as he tries, Tang Mo can’t beat the monkeys who were born to climb. One of the monkeys claws two wounds on his arm, and the other one hangs down from a branch, grabbing Tang Mo’s arms. Immediately, the big match appears in Tang Mo’s hands, and he slams it into the monkey’s chest with all of his strength.

The monkey flies, but it also kicks Tang Mo’s chest and sends him flying as well.

Tang Mo falls to the ground with a bang.

The next second, all the monsters gather around him.

“An Undergrounder!” the gorilla says, swallowing hard. “It’s been so long since I’ve seen such a fresh Undergrounder.”

The pig-headed person’s eyes shine with excitement as it looks at Tang Mo. “Can we eat it?”

“Eat! Eat the Undergrounder!”

“Eat the Undergrounder!”

Tang Mo’s brain whirrs as he considers the weapons and abilities that he can use.

The big match is useless here. It’s a very good weapon, but Tang Mo can’t fight off so many monsters alone. He can’t even run away, much less fight.

‘Draw a circle to curse you’ can only curse one opponent, and the effect is uncertain too.

He’s already used ‘Give back my grandpa,’ which was the only ability that could pose a threat to these monsters.

Then there’s the friend-finding ability, wind-breathing ability, defensive abilities… 

Tang Mo’s face sinks lower and lower.

All his abilities added together wouldn’t be able to beat these monsters!

Should he save? Save as soon as he entered the game? But then what would he do if he ran into danger later? He just started the tower-attack game and doesn’t even know his main mission yet!

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Main mission… 

A thought flashes across his mind. Tang Mo suddenly remembers that, during the emergency, the Black Tower gave him a mission, but he didn’t have time to think about it since he was too busy running away.

The Black Tower wouldn’t force him into a dead end. Tang Mo doesn’t think that he’s done anything wrong since entering this game. He recalls every action he took, and none of it was necessarily wrong. He didn’t ignore any hints, either. Even when he was fighting against the rabbit, he only used ‘Give back my grandpa.’ Otherwise, he might have died in the rabbit’s hands.

So there’s only… 

Tang Mo takes out a beautiful red jewel from his pocket and lifts it high above his head. Suddenly, a stinky hat appears on his head and something grows beneath his nose. Tang Mo nearly passes out from the stench. 

With difficulty, he manages not to puke, gritting out from between his teeth, “I’m Little Red Riding Hood.”

The monsters blink.

“Little Red Riding Hood?”

“Who’s Little Red Riding Hood?”

“Have you heard of Little Red Riding Hood?”

Tang Mo sits in the middle of a group of monsters, head down, hiding his expression beneath Mario’s stinky hat. This is the only solution he can come up with right now. The Black Tower wouldn’t put him into a dead-end situation, otherwise it wouldn’t be a game but a massacre.

But if Little Red Riding Hood is wrong, or if Mario’s hat can’t disguise him well enough to deceive these monsters, then Tang Mo can only save the game and battle to the death.

Maybe the Black Tower really is this vile, making him use his save file right at the beginning.

“Ah, I remember, wasn’t Grandma’s mixed-race granddaughter called Little Red Riding Hood?” a parrot squawks. “Grandma’s daughter, you guys remember? She eloped with an Undergrounder ten years ago and had a mixed-race kid! Yesterday Grandma was just telling me how sweet her granddaughter was, how she was going to come over from the Undergrounder Kingdom to see her these few days. Is this her?”

The huge gorilla points at Tang Mo’s mustache. “He’s a male Undergrounder, not a female[1].”

Tang Mo: “...”

Expressionlessly, Tang Mo tears off Mario’s mustache and climbs to his feet. “You saw wrong.”

The gorilla scratches its head. “Oh, I saw wrong. So you’re Little Red Riding Hood, huh. Why didn’t you say so earlier? Hey, you guys go put out that fire. Come on, Little Red Riding Hood, I’ll take you to your grandma.”

Tang Mo’s upper lip burns with pain. With his physical condition now, he wouldn’t have ripped away any flesh when he ripped the hairs away, but the pain is still as intense as when he was still a normal person.

Gorilla: “Little Red Riding Hood, why do you smell so bad?”

“We Undergrounders don’t like to bathe,” Tang Mo says coldly.

The gorilla nods. “No wonder. That thing under your nose was dirt, wasn’t it? We monsters love to clean ourselves. You can’t take after those Undergrounds, okay?”

Tang Mo crushes the mustache in his hand. He doesn’t want to say anything.

Under the gorilla’s guidance, they walk out of the maze-like forest in two hours and come to a valley.

This valley is in the complete opposite direction as the knife mountain that Tang Mo saw before. The gorilla talks to Tang Mo as they enter the valley, saying, “You really are such a kind and obedient Little Red Riding Hood. It’s almost time to plant the crops. This is the busiest season, and you’re coming to help your grandma with her land!”

Tang Mo keeps a half a meter of distance between himself and the gorilla. He quietly hums once in response.

Gorilla: “These few years, Monster Valley isn’t very peaceful.”

It pushes away a large rock, revealing a dark tunnel.

The gorilla walks in, but Tang Mo stops.

The gorilla turns back, looking at him weirdly. “Little Red Riding Hood?”

Tang Mo remembers that ‘Enter Monster Valley’ and grits his teeth, walking into the tunnel.

With a thud, the rock closes behind Tang Mo.

“Ding dong! Side Mission 1 completed.”

The gorilla picks up a torch beside a rock and lights up the tunnel. Tang Mo follows behind the gorilla and continues to walk deeper into the dark.

This tunnel is very wide. Well, rather than a tunnel, it’s more of a large cave. On the ceiling, many black stalactites hang down from the ceiling, small drops of water gathering on the tips. Tang Mo follows behind the gorilla; they keep walking down, getting further and further away from the surface.

After about ten minutes, they reach the end of the tunnel and the gorilla pushes open another big rock.

Suddenly, everything brightens.

Tang Mo’s eyes open wide as he looks at this wide space hidden below the ground.

“Underground is really where the first floor of the Black Tower is,” the gorilla exclaims. “It feels so unnatural being above ground. Oh yeah, Little Red Riding Hood, why were you in the forest between the first and second floors?”

Tang Mo umms and ahhs a bit and manages to pass it off as an answer.

The big gorilla doesn’t press and leads him into the valley.

Before seeing this valley, no one would have believed that there would be such a huge world underground.

The large valley is surrounded by three pyramid-shaped underground mountains. In the middle of the land, there’s a clear pink river, which runs from one side of the valley to the other, vanishing into the distance.

Between the three mountains are houses made from hay and mud. From afar, he can already see more than 20 little houses, each with a plot of land in front. Right now, those plots of land are totally bare, with only tilled dirt but no crops.

There’s no one in the valley. They’ve probably all gone to put out the fire.

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The gorilla leads Tang Mo onto a path, going deep into the last mountain. Tang Mo walks slower and slower, putting his hand on his match tattoo as he cautiously looks ahead.

A pink chimney appears from behind the hill. The gorilla points at it. “Look, that’s your grandma’s house.”

Hand still pressing on his tattoo, Tang Mo nods.

The gorilla doesn’t know who Little Red Riding Hood is, but Little Red Riding Hood’s grandma probably does. In accordance with the Black Tower’s request, Tang Mo has entered Monster Valley. He can vaguely feel that the key to this tower-attack game, or maybe even the main mission, should be in this valley. If his identity is exposed by Little Red Riding Hood’s grandma, then Tang Mo’s only choice is to run away and hide in some corner of the valley, waiting for a chance to find the main mission.

After turning a corner, Grandma’s house comes into view.

A pink mud house sits abruptly between two small green trees. A golden fence surrounds the plot of land in front of the house, and in the middle of the plot of land, there are many mirror-like rocks set in the ground, forming a path that leads from the gate to the house.

The gorilla knocks on the gate. “Grandma, Grandma, I’ve brought Little Red Riding Hood with me.”

Tang Mo’s entire body tenses, focus gathered to an extreme so that he can run at any time. At this moment, he hears dull footsteps, like something huge dragging on the floor, thumping step by step on the ground, making the entire mountain tremble.

“Creak—”

The pink door opens.

Tang Mo’s right foot is already turned away, ready to run at any moment.

A giant humanoid animal wearing a white top hat and a pink dress appears in the doorframe. She’s so buff and tall that she needs to bend over to come out of the door. That little pink dress is wrapped so tightly around her body that the hard lines of muscle show through. It looks ridiculous, like a bodybuilder wearing a little girl’s dress.

The giant brim of the hat covers her face, so Tang Mo can only see a big hand covered in black fur.

She takes small steps, prim and proper, like a lady from the upper class of society, and gradually makes her way to the gate. Tang Mo is 180 cm tall and only reaches her shoulders. She slowly releases the hand pressing down on the hat brim, revealing a big mouth that juts out and a pair of sharp, wolf-like… wolf’s eyes.

The gorilla smiles dumbly. “Grandma Wolf, I’ve brought Little Red Riding Hood.”

The moment Tang Mo sees Grandma Wolf, he turns and runs, but her heavy hand suddenly clamps down on his shoulder. Tang Mo realizes with a shock that he can’t escape this hand. Though she’s not pressing very hard, Grandma Wolf has him completely held in place, unable to move.

“This really is my Little Red Riding Hood. I’ll never forget her father’s smelly hat, not in my entire life. Uncle Gorilla, you don’t know how stinky her father’s hat is. See, it’s only a little bit better than hers.”

Grandma Wolf opens her bloody mouth and smiles.

Tang Mo sees a human finger stuck between her teeth.

Grandma Wolf grabs Tang Mo’s arm, using only a small amount of force to bring him into her yard.

“My cute Little Red Riding Hood must be so hungry. Come, Grandma will make you some food.”

The giant Grandma Wolf holds onto Tang Mo’s collar with one hand and drags him into the house. The door shuts with a bang. Outside, the gorilla scratches its head as it leaves. “Grandma’s in a good mood today.”

Tang Mo is pretty much thrown into the house.

As soon as the door closes, Grandma Wolf slams him into the wall. Tang Mo rolls twice and steadies himself beside the fireplace. He shoots to his feet, but Grandma Wolf ignores him. Dropping her disgusting ladylike behavior, she takes huge steps to the fireplace, grabs a dried human arm, and begins to gnaw on it.

The too-small dress rips apart because of Grandma Wolf’s violent actions. She impatiently curses and rips the dress off, throwing it into the fireplace where it burns to ash.

“Take your damned hat off!” Grandma Wolf breaks the wrist in one bite, crunching on it as she chews. “That stinky hat is exactly the same as your father’s. Don’t think I’ll be nice to you. These seven days, you’ll only get seven copper coins, not a single one more.”

After hearing this, Tang Mo actually relaxes a lot. A keyword flashes through his mind: seven days.

Tang Mo never wanted to wear this hat in the first place, but the moment he takes it off, Grandma Wolf glares at him, crunching down on the elbow of this arm like she’s eating duck neck. “Undergrounder hair is the most disgusting thing in this world. Put your hat back on and don’t let me see that hair again, otherwise I’ll pluck it all off of your head!”

Tang Mo: “...”

Fuck you!

Grandma Wolf chews up all of the meat and spits out the bone fragments, looking at Tang Mo.

Tang Mo puts the hat back on, then expressionlessly rips off the mustache that grows on his face.

Grandma Wolf glares at him again, then turns and continues to eat her dinner.

The furniture in this pink house is also pink. The house isn’t big, but the small dining table has a thick layer of dust on it. Tang Mo estimates that no one’s touched that table in at least a month. Perhaps its owner prefers to put her food on the ground and eat it with her hands.

There’s a rug underneath the sofa, made of some sort of pink fur that Tang Mo’s never seen before. His gaze wanders around the house, finally landing on the fireplace, then lifts up slightly, settling on the human head hanging above the fireplace.

Like every deer head mounted above the fireplace, this is a taxidermied human head.

Slightly curly, long black hair hangs down from both sides of the face. This middle-aged man has his eyes closed and mouth open, as if he was sleeping when he was put on the wall. If, of course, his face wasn’t bloodless in death, pale to the point of looking green.

Tang Mo takes one look and moves his gaze away.

Grandma Wolf finally finishes the arm. She throws the leftover bone shards into the fireplace. The fire crackles, and the sharp smell of burnt bone wafts into the air.

“Don’t expect me to give you dinner.” Grandma Wolf wipes away the blood and meat on her mouth with her hand. “Seven copper coins is already enough compensation. From tomorrow, you’ll go catch that golden gopher. If I come back seven days later and still don’t see that golden gopher’s corpse…”

Tang Mo raises his head, looking coldly at this giant wolf-person.

Grandma Wolf opens her mouth in a serene, kind smile. There’s still a finger stuck between her teeth. “Then you’ll be my dinner.”

Thump, thump, thump. Every step Grandma Wolf takes shakes the house. She slams the bedroom door shut, and soon enough, Tang Mo hears thunderous snoring.

Tang Mo finally begins to walk around the house.

He closely examines every table and chair, even the clump of human hair hidden for who-knows-how-long in the sofa. This house is no different than a small hunting cabin, except the head hanging above the fireplace is no longer an animal, but a human.

As adaptable as Tang Mo is, he can’t fall asleep underneath a human head.

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He takes his bag to the dining table and lies down on the floor, gaze focusing on the ceiling of the small pink house. He goes through a list of everything that’s happened since entering the first floor of the Black Tower.

The first floor of the Black Tower is underground. That forest was the border between the first and second floors.

The big gorilla, the giant monkeys, Grandma Wolf, Little Red Riding Hood… 

Little Red Riding Hood came to watch the land for Grandma Wolf.

Seven copper coins. Seven days.

Is this mission supposed to take seven days?

Tang Mo clearly knows that he definitely wouldn’t be able to win in a fight against Grandma Wolf, so the only thing he can do now is wait for the main mission.

The Black Tower will definitely announce the main mission soon.

Tang Mo looks at the ceiling and thinks for an entire night.

The next noon, the sound of drawers and doors opening bursts from Grandma Wolf’s bedroom. When she comes out, she’s changed into a pink dress with lace trim, her buff body wrapped in a small dress that could rip at any time. She takes small, dainty steps and slowly makes her way to the door.

“...”

Tang Mo doesn’t even want to look.

Grandma Wolf picks up a small pink parasol and puts her large black hand on the door handle. Suddenly, she turns to look at Tang Mo. “You know how to look over the land and catch that disgusting golden gopher, right?”

Tang Mo is silent for a while. “No.”

“Your mom didn’t even teach you this? Damn it, I even have to teach you this, then your compensation is only six copper coins now… No! It’s five, and you’re not getting anything more!”

She picks up a pink urn and throws it at him. “Seeding season starts seven days later. I’ve heard that the ringmaster of the circus has found a precious treasure, so I need to see it. These seven days that I’m gone, you’re going to watch the plot on the back side of the mountain.”

Tang Mo follows Grandma Wolf to the window.

Through the window, Tang Mo sees a plot of land even bigger than the one in the yard. The dark soil has already been tilled, and all that’s left is seeding. This plot of land sits at the foot of a mountain. Tang Mo notices the nine big holes in the side of the mountain.

“Those damned gophers, when did they make another hole?” Grandma Wolf’s so angry that she gnashes her teeth. “Today’s the first day, you have to put food into one of the holes at 6pm every day, then hide in the hole. When that golden gopher comes out to eat, that's when you catch it!”

Tang Mo immediately understands that this might be his main mission. He asks, “Is any hole okay? There are nine holes, after all.”

Grandma Wolf says casually, “Of course. As long as you put the food in and stand there, that stupid golden gopher will think that you’re feeding it. Golden gophers love you Undergrounders. As long as you stand at the same hole as the food, it’ll believe you. Of course, there’s only an 80% chance that it’ll appear. There’s a 20% chance that it’ll be a black gopher.”

Tang Mo’s eyebrows furrow. “What’ll happen with a black gopher?”

“Black gophers love to eat you Undergrounders.” Grandma Wolf laughs evilly. “To rip off Undergrounders’ heads and dip them in fresh ketchup… Oh! That’s the most delicious thing in the entire world! But I don’t recommend you catch that golden gopher on the first day. These seven days are right when the gophers end hibernation and come out to find food. Golden gophers are lazier than black gophers and always like to sleep more. Black gophers show up more on the first day. Hmm, about 50%.”

Tang Mo remembers all of these words. “Where do I get the food to feed the golden gopher with?”

Grandma Wolf looks at Tang Mo weirdly. “The urn in your hands? Put anything belonging to your Undergrounder Kingdom in, and it’ll give you the sweet potatoes that golden gophers love to eat. God only know why those stupid golden gophers like you Undergrounds so much. How can sweet potatoes compare to Undergrounder meat? Fresh, tender Undergrounder meat…”

Grandma Wolf swallows hard, gaze lingering on Tang Mo.

Tang Mo already has an outline of the mission objective. Lastly, he asks, “So it’s okay if I catch the golden gopher within any one of the seven days?”

“Of course. But if I come back in seven days and don’t see that golden gopher…”

Grandma Wolf snickers, picking up the parasol and leaving. Her exclamation passes through the door and into the house: “Oh, Undergrounder meat…”

A clear voice sounds in the house— 

“Ding dong! Activated main mission: Happy Whack-a-Mole in Monster Valley.”

“Game rules—”

“Number one, there is only one golden gopher in Monster Valley.”

“Number two, there are a total of nine holes.”

“Number three, the Monster World is like the Earth, where a day is 24 hours.”

“Number four, putting anything belonging to the Undergrounder Kingdom into the pink urn will result in a sweet potato that the golden gopher loves to eat. The food must be placed into the hole at exactly 6pm, otherwise there will be no effect.”

“Number five, when the player stands at the same hole as the sweet potato, the chance of a golden gopher appearing is 80%, and the chance of a black gopher appearing is 20%.”

“Number six, the chance of a golden gopher appearing on the first day is 40%, and the chance of a black gopher appearing is 60%.”

“Number seven, the player may only place food at one hole per day. If the food is simultaneously placed at more than one hole, or if the player does not stand at the same hole as the food, the chance of a golden gopher appearing is 0%.”

“Number eight, before seeding season, gophers only move around in the holes.”

“Grandma Wolf only plants crops once a year, but that wretched golden gopher always eats them. Thinking of ways to catch it always makes Grandma Wolf’s head hurt, until one day she suddenly remembers, perhaps her cute granddaughter will have an idea.”

Notes

[1]	Here the monsters specifically use the animal terms for 'male' and 'female' (公，母) instead of the human terms (男，女).

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