When Jian Songyi saw Wang Shan, he was in a trance.

He looks so thin and pale. He resembled haggardness in every way.

It’s not what he remembers him as.

The Wang Shan in his memory is the same paranoid patient who would say “Bai Huai, I hate you” in the pale ward three years ago.

At that time, Jian Songyi accompanied Bai Huai to the hospital. From the moment he entered the ward, Wang Shan looked at Jian Songyi with a cold and complicated look, with an inexplicable hatred.

Jian Songyi had never had someone look at him like this before. That is why he could not stand it. As a result, he went out, saying that he would just simply wait for Bai Huai outside of the ward. Later, he didn’t know what they talked about, but soon enough, Bai Huai left after that day.

So Wang Shan’s gloom and paranoia left an extraordinarily deep impression on him. Not to mention a deep grudge. That’s why he was extraordinarily reluctant to have this person reappear in Bai Huai’s life.

He did not want it to come to this, but he always felt that there are things to completely untie so that they wouldn’t always be wary of this minefield anymore.

Besides, the police station is just beside here. It’s safe.

With his hands in his pockets, he walked slowly to Wang Shan and said, “Come to plead for Wang Hai?”

Wang Shan said faintly: “Wang Hai did something wrong and paid the price.”

“This has nothing to do with you?”

“If I had known, I wouldn’t have let him do it. I’ve been in psychotherapy for three years, and I’m not so crazy. You can rest assured. “

Jian Songyi bowed his head and kicked the pebbles. He was not very interested in Wang Hai’s personal experience. He only cared about Bai Huai and said lazily, “So is this a sudden discovery of conscience? Are you going to repent or what?”

“I have nothing to confess. I still hate people like you. I’m not sorry to Bai Huai. I broke my own leg. I’m sorry to my parents at best. When I went to Bai Huai, I just wanted to say thank you to him for letting bygones be bygones and helping my parents so that they didn’t collapse. “

“No, he doesn’t need it.”

This gratitude of yours, as far as BaiHuai is concerned, is too unimportant and irrelevant.

Wang Shan smiled mockingly. “I know. That’s why I came to you.”

Jian Songyi loosely kicks the stone: “If you want to come to me to boast about how good you are now, it’s not necessary, because I know it.”

“Jian Songyi, you are really annoying.”

“Oh, my pleasure.”

“I came to you because of something else.” Wang Shan looked up at him. “Do you know that I stole something from Bai Huai and then ended up having a fight with him? You should know that at that time, we were having our self-evening study. The usually calm and cold Bai Huai had gotten angry at me for the first time that I was so surprised.”

“So think about how annoying you are as a person.”

 Jian Songyi did not give up any opportunity to express his disgust with Wang Shan.

Wang Shan did not deny it that much: “I am indeed annoying for i did steal something from Bai Huai. But I did not steal the things that Bai Huai lost beforehand. The things I stole from him are worthless. “

Jian Songyi was not surprised. Bai Huai is the kind of person that can crush a watch worth 1 million yuan in front of him while looking so unbothered. It must have nothing to do with money.

“I threw that thing down from the sixth floor at that time. Bai Huai looked for it with a flashlight all night and couldn’t find it because I hid it.”

Wang Shan took out his backpack from behind him. He then took out something that was wrapped in a plastic bag, looking like a book of some sort. Wang Shan handed it over to him.

“I brought it this time since I originally wanted to make an exchange, but now I don’t think it’s necessary, so I am returning it to the original owner.”

“If you are giving me something that is Bai Huai’s, then it will not be classified as returning it to its original owner.”

Wang Shan bowed his head and smiled. He placed his hands on the wheel of his wheelchair. He ever so slowly rolled it before turning his head.”

“Jian Songyi, do you know why I hate Bai Huai? It is because I liked him, but because of my inferiority complex, I have never gotten the chance to say it.”

On the other hand, the person he has a crush on humbly and secretly likes another person, which is equally humble and unspeakable.

Make yourself look like a joke.

The slightly self-deprecating voice, accompanied by the sound of wheels running over the slate road, gradually dissipated in the night, leaving only a cavity of frustration.

Jian Songyi bowed his head and opened the plastic bag to reveal its contents. It happened to be a children’s sketchbook of an earlier brand.

It was covered with old water stains and mud. There are a lot of parts that are completely unrecognizable. It’s old and dilapidated that its binding is also about to be torn any time if handled recklessly.

But Jian Songyi still recognized the sketchbook.

When he was a child, he was uncertain and wanted to learn everything. For a period of time, when he wanted to learn to draw, he pulled Bai Huai along.

Unfortunately, he did not learn after studying for more than a year, but Bai Huai persisted.

On the first page of the sketchbook, two trees are drawn askew, growing alike, but one is written with cypress and the other with pine, pretending to be cypress and pine.

Next to the tree is a row of clear and powerful lean gold: “I hope the two children can become the same men as pines and cypresses- Uncle Zheng. “

The second page of the sketchbook is full of squares with strawberries and a watchman next to it.

Next to it was a row of crooked words that no one else can read but Jian Songyi: ‘Huai gege,shi world to me zui good de people.’

Thin gold body annotations: ‘small pine will write Huai characters, awesome.’

On the third page is a big match man and two small match people with scenery full of flowers.

Note: Small pine can draw Uncle Zheng’s favorite Platycodon grandiflorum flower.

Page 4, page 5, page 6.

…….

Page 17

The two little match men hugged each other and shed tears.

No lean body annotations.

Page 18 is another kind of thin handwriting.

Dad, I miss you. I miss you so much.

Page 19.

The figure of a teenager is thin and arrogant.

Page 20.

The side profile of the teenager has a pair of beautiful peach blossom eyes.

Page 21.

Page 22.

…….

Drawings of the teenager smiling, frowning, sitting, sleeping, reading, teasing the kitten – they’re all the same teenager.

Page 45.

Dad, I was supposed to be happy that I was divided into Alpha.

But I seem to like him.

So I’m not so happy anymore.

And then, it came to an abrupt end.

Jian Songyi let out a deep breath. He wiped the corners of his eyes, carefully putting away the fragmented sketchbook. He wrapped it back tightly on the plastic bag and held it in his arms. He immediately turned around.

Then he saw the late autumn night, Bai Huai stepped on the dim light. He walked slowly from the mist and stood in front of him. 

“I thought I told you to wait for me. How did you get out?” The ends of his fingertips gently rubbed the ends of his eyes. “How come Brother Song still has red eyes?”

“It’s the sand.”

“Shall I blow it for you?”

“Get out.”

“Why are you so aggressive?”

……….

Jian Songyi stared loosely at the ground as he sniffled. 

“Bai Huai”

“Mm-hmm.”

“The question I wanted to ask you is why on earth did you go to Beicheng in the first place?”

Bai Huai rubbed Jane’s loose fingertips for a moment, and then slowly said, “You.”

There was only one word: “You”

But as slow as Jian Songyi is, he also understands that Bai Huai has been hiding his bitter truth for too long. All the struggles of youth, feeling lonely for being alone, and the deep feeling of self-knowledge.

“Then why did you retu-”

“It’s you again.”

“…..”

“Jian Songyi, from the beginning to the end, it’s all you. Do you now understand?”

……….

Translator’s Note:

The long wait is over, my fellow readers. The time has finally come. Bai Huai’s feelings had finally gotten through Jian Songyi.